Celebrate Valentine’s Day (or don’t!) with Bi+ Undiluted: harmony and Bi+ Undiluted: dissonance!

Bi+ Undiluted harmony and dissonance

For many, bisexuality is not just an identity, it’s a profound experience. Whether reflecting on a person’s internal journey or navigating interpersonal relationships, identifying as bisexual signifies a declaration of choice – embracing the totality of the past, present, and future. A bisexual person’s love life is often decorated with as much duality as their relationship preferences, creating a tragically beautiful tapestry of happiness, heartbreak, comedy, tragedy, gains, losses, harmony, and dissonance. No matter which chapter your story is in, the BRC’s first official entries into Bi+ Undiluted: Season 1 are here to help you celebrate your present moment and the choices we make in the name of love.

Bi+ Undiluted: harmony and Bi+ Undiluted: dissonance is a dual-publication conceptual music resource that can be enjoyed year-round. The first, “harmony” is tender and romantic, perfect for any stretch of your date night. The latter, “dissonance”, is cathartic and pointed, with a “punk-rock” sensibility, themed towards honoring yourself and releasing the past. 

As I began to hear these publications come to life, I was struck by how personal these projects had become from a curatorial standpoint. In the way that the OG “Bi+ Undiluted, presented by Bisexual Resource Center’‘ allowed the BRC’s history to speak through me, in the case of this dual-publication, especially “dissonance”, the project instead allows my personal curatorial history to speak through the BRC. The Broadway Boy in me has a penchant for lyrically dark and brooding music, even when life is at its most Bi-conic. I felt called to use that sensibility for “dissonance”, but with a “post-melancholy” twist. Admittedly, its parallelism scared me at first –  I wasn’t sure if it was a taste that would be shared as wholly by the bisexual+ community. But at the same time, it excited me beyond measure. 

As I curated “dissonance”, I revisited pivotal moments in my adult life, most notably a relationship that compelled me to believe that I was better off putting my budding queer identity back on the shelf. After a string of painful “first” same-gender relationships, I told myself that I gave dating guys the chance that friends and love-interests alike had begged me to take, and convinced myself that it would never hold any long-term viability. I locked myself back into the unsung, invisible bisexual life, and told myself that while I planned to be open about my dating history with future dates, I would only pursue different-gender relationships from that point forward. The relationship that brought me to this point was especially brutal, as it was a combined 19-or-so months of apathy, crass humor, and isolation that I pushed through by telling myself that that was just how same-gender relationships are, and maybe I just needed to go through it and try and make it work. 

Thanks to therapy (shout out to Dr. D!), I came to honor the fact that pain, confusion, and loneliness are not love. I ended things with that guy for the second time, and made it clear that this time was for good. I remember even referencing the song “Dead” by Madison Beer to describe that relationship to my therapist, and she essentially said that was the tea. While it was a decision that I had avoided at various times throughout the relationship, it was the first time I ever empowered myself to defy everything he and other toxic people would say to get me to stay in painful relationships, and embraced the fact that I deserved better.

I’m happy to say the next chapter in my life’s love story is the inspiration behind “dissonance”’s sister publication, “harmony”.  It’s about that “where have you been all my life”, “you complete me”, “let’s do this forever” kind of love. A few months after calling it quits with Mr. Toxicity, I happened to reconnect with a handsome astrologer & psychology major who lived on the opposite end of the freeway, and thus began the rest of my life. From the very first date, he showed me that he loved me in every way, for exactly who I already was. He proved to me that he wanted to accompany me through life before I had even asked him to officially be my boyfriend. We started dating, and immediately my life changed. The love we discovered was so powerful that it empowered me to publicly come out as bisexual, and openly acknowledge a same-gender relationship for the first time in my life. Needless to say, that decision alone even changed the entire trajectory of my career – I even saw a few of my biggest dreams come true in my primary entertainment career within the first two months of us being together. 

“harmony” is dedicated to my partner, Jonathan De Arruda, and the magic his love brings into my life every single day. Every Valentine’s Day, we make playlists for each other, and this year, I’m making mine a part of the Bi+ Undiluted series and inviting the world to take a glimpse at the kind of love that brought this article, my seat on the board of the BRC, my position as Executive Curator of the Bi+ Media Resource Initiative, and my world-class expertise into the universe. The playlist captures the essence of our love story, with a few tender memories in particular – I remember listening to “Kiss Me More” by Doja Cat & SZA every time I would turn into his neighborhood before picking him up for our first few dates. On one of our many trips up to Malibu, we realized how many songs we knew with “Malibu” as or in the title, and made a playlist of them, the final track being “Malibu” by Miley Cyrus (special shoutout to allies Trixie Mattel and Ayoni for their tracks of the same name!). 

Songs like “Magic” by Raveena, “Moon River” by Frank Ocean, “FOOL” by Alyson Stoner, “Death of a Bachelor” by Panic! At The Disco!, and “Yoü and I” by Lady Gaga, also hold a great deal of significance in “harmony”, for reasons that I’ll leave the keen-eyed bisexual mystics to decipher. 

As February 14th comes along, no matter which music resource you’ll be bumping, remember that we as bisexuals wield the power of choice when it comes to love. If someone doesn’t love you in the right way, choose somebody who does – even if that somebody is you.

Bi+ Undiluted: harmony is available to stream now on Spotify, Apple Music, and TIDAL.

In addition, Bi+ Undiluted: dissonance is available to scream stream now on Spotify, Apple Music, and TIDAL

​​Vincent Paz-Macareno is the world’s leading expert on bi+ representation in music and leads projects and speaking engagements surrounding Bi+ Representation in Media. He is the first Latiné person on record to serve on the Bisexual Resource Center’s Board of Directors, and is the Executive Curator of the organization’s Bi+ Media Resource Initiative. He also sets the direction of their social responsibility initiatives as facilitator of their Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, Justice, & Belonging committee. Vincent is currently based in Los Angeles and is a proud member of Actors’ Equity Association.

IG: @_vincentpm / / LinkedIn: in/vincentpm